The Oscars 2017: Well, What A Hoo-Ha

And the award for ‘Best Ceremonial Cock-Up’ goes to…

One would think Steve Harvey’s debacle with the ‘Miss Universe’ envelopes would be the last ceremonial fiasco… so that’s what being utterly and diabolically wrong feels like.

In the words of Dowager Countess Grantham, “I do hate to be predictable” and the Oscars followed suit. But it wasn’t all bad, as I watched Damian Chazelle and company graciously give their awards to the equally deserved creatives behind Moonlight (WHAT A FILM).

The Oscars have now earned an indelible place in our hearts as one of Hollywood’s biggest movie mistakes, and I’m not just talking about Meryl Streep’s acting nomination for the calamitous concoction Florence Foster Jenkins: a comedy of errors indeed. Until the ‘Big Event’, the cosmic shock was Hacksaw Ridge knocking out La La Land in Best Editing, and well-deserved if truth be told.

This has to be one of the worst mistakes since the dawn of time

This has to be one of the worst mistakes since the dawn of time

There were many great speeches on that fateful Sunday, including a moving ode from Viola Davis, winning Best Supporting Actress for Fences. You know Viola Davis is in for a win when her sweat, snot and tears make it onto the screen, regardless if that’s as Annalise Keating or Rose Maxson.

But the best speech of the evening goes to the half articulated sermon from La La Land, a monologue that was as slick and polished as the film itself… and then Moonlight happened.

Shocked faces were seen throughout the audience. It was like something straight out off the set of Downton Abbey, a maid serving in the dining room. Carson would have a fit. La La Land bowing to Moonlight was a societal collapse.

Imminent societal collapse, oh the horror!!

Societal apocalypse hath cometh!!

Viola Davis and Mahershala Ali went home with Oscars in supporting roles, delivering powerful speeches that every bit matched their awards. Deservedly, Casey Affleck beat Ole Denz for his role in Manchester By The  Sea. Unlike previous years, it was great to see a ceremony that wasn’t so whitewashed. After two years of #OscarsSoWhite, two black wins in acting is a victory.

Diversity aside, the other issue to dominate was politics and thus we had many potent jibes at Mr Trump. Host Jimmy Kimmel was very witty indeed, and not one fuck was given.

The best political statement was when Best Foreign Language Feature was announced. Iranian director Asghar Farhadi (winning for The Salesman) didn’t turn up to accept it, as protest to Mr Trump’s travel ban. He sent a message saying: “Dividing the world into the us and our enemies categories creates fear. A deceitful justification for aggression and war.”

Compared to previous years, we’ve had a very unpolitical Oscars. That being said, they made up for it at the Golden Globes. If you don’t believe me, ask Meryl about the time she blew the roof off the Golden Globes when she spoke out against Trump without uttering his name. Typically, the leader of the free world got triggered, and vented his outrage on Twitter. How novel.

Go home Donald, you're drunk!

Go home Donald, you’re drunk!

So this year’s Oscars was Jimmy Kimmel roasting Matt Damon, a few jabs at Trump and the Moonlight/La La Land hoo-ha becoming a meme overnight.

Until 2018 folks, I must skedaddle.

NB: Moana did not find Maui, shapeshifter, demigod of the wind and sea, hero of man and restore the heart of Tafiti to lose Best Song to Ryan Gosling’s competent voice. As much as I loved La La Land, moral standards must take precedence.


Tré Griffiths


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